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Dressed in her perfect white wedding dress, Alanna Wilkinson gazed lovingly into the eyes of her partner Angus Robb.
But this was no ordinary ceremony – the couple got married in a neonatal intensive care unit, as the monitors beeped and other hospital activity was going on around them.
And ‘witness’ to their vows was their precious three-week-old son, Rafferty, who had survived the ordeal after being born at 24 weeks’ gestation – weighing little more than a tub of margarine.
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As Alanna and Angus said yes in the intensive care unit, their tiny newborn was in a wet crib next to them.
Entwined in cables and attached to machinery, the tiny baby was affectionately dubbed the ‘best boy’ for his parents’ big day.
When Rafferty was born just three weeks early – 16 weeks before his due date – his prognosis was grim.
His parents hoped their little baby would survive, but if he didn’t, they wanted him to feel the love that brought him into the world.
“I thought if we couldn’t bring him home, he’d be there (at the wedding),” Alanna says of her son’s participation in her ceremony at Brisbane’s Mater Mothers Hospital NICU.
“I just wanted him to feel that love.”
The proud mum from Lismore in the Northern Rivers region of New South Wales remembers 7 Life for her wedding day as Rafferty, now two years old, runs around her.
The little “chaos monkey” is blissfully unaware of his dramatic entry into the world and the 92 days he spends in hospital – at first fighting for his life, then learning to thrive.
When Alana discovered that it was pregnantthe couple decided not to learn the gender of the baby.
She suspected she was carrying a boy, despite what others told her.
“I just felt like a boy, even though everyone called me a girl,” Alana says.
“Two psychics even told me we were having a girl.”
The couple began discussing names, and although several girl names were chosen, they only had one option for a boy.
When the excited mom-to-be was halfway through her pregnancy, she started experiencing some bleeding.
Numerous tests at the local hospital revealed that her baby showed no signs of distress.
So Alana put her worries aside to focus on her upcoming wedding.
24 weeks pregnant, she bought her dream wedding dress.
But just days after returning home with her purchase, she returned to the hospital with severe cramps.
“I was in early labor,” reveals Alana.
“The doctors basically went through a whole list of things that would happen if the baby was born today, next week or next month.
“It was honestly just a list of problems that a baby could potentially have.”
If the baby was born 16 weeks early, doctors feared he would have severely underdeveloped organs and would need medical equipment to stay alive outside the womb.
Alana was transferred to the Mater Maternity Hospital in Brisbane, where a specialist team prepared for a premature birth.
“The plan was to keep the baby as long as possible,” Alana explains, revealing that she was given medication to stop the labor.
“Now we know my son didn’t agree with the plan.”
Just two days later, Alana alerted a midwife that her baby was coming and coming now.
She was prepared for an emergency C-section and taken to theatre.
“They put a mask over my face, ready to knock me out, but I caught it naturally,” Alana says.
Midwives started singing happy birthday when baby Rafferty was born – before he let out a powerful cry.
At a tiny 704 grams, he entered the world as a fighter.
He was taken to the special care nursery, with Angus by his side.
A few hours later, Alanna was able to hug her boy for the first time.
“It’s definitely not what you imagine,” she says of the moments after her son’s birth.
“It was wrapped in bandages, it was so tiny. It looked like a little pouch baby.”
The first skin-to-skin cuddle is a moment a new mother will never forget.
Alana, who is a singer and songwriter, started writing a song especially for her boy while she spent every sleeping moment next to his crib.
“The whole world is waiting for you, my darling,” she sang lovingly.
Worried parents were warned the next 10 days would be a honeymoon period as Rafferty tried to survive.
Since he was two weeks old, they weren’t sure if their little son would make it.
“He was starting all these goals and then things started to falter,” Alana says.
“We started having all these scary conversations with doctors about all the complications that come with growing outside the womb.”
Alana was making her way to her son’s den one morning when hospital staff stopped her, prodding the new parents that Rafferty had had a very rough night.
Alanna says the moment she saw her son, she first thought she might not be taking him home.
“Seeing him like that was the catalyst (for the NICU wedding) – I just told Angus we should get married here in front of him,” she says.
Angus couldn’t agree more.
Planning
Word got around the hospital, with midwives helping to organize the plans and one even volunteering her time as a photographer.
In just 10 days, Alanna found a local celebrant on Instagram and wore her dream wedding dress, which she had bought in the days before she went into labour.
“Everyone just moved mountains for us,” she says.
“A nurse even bought him (Rafferty) clothing.”
And as the couple exchanged their vows, their ‘best boy’ was the perfect witness on the big day.
After a little celebration in the NICU, the newlyweds threw themselves back into caring for Rafferty full-time.
Every day – as Alana strummed her ukulele and sang Dream Big, her original song created out of love for her boy – Rafferty grew stronger.
“Every day you get bigger and I write songs to sing to you while you rest,” Alana sang.
With each chorus she watched his progress, quoting music therapy as a remarkable treatment.
And after 92 long days in the hospital, little Rafferty was discharged.
“We just cried and cried and cried,” Alana says.
“It was a huge relief.”
Now it seems Rafferty has picked up his mum’s singing skills, with the two-year-old jumping on tables and singing several times a day.
“He’s just studying the world,” Alanna smiles.
“He’s an absolute finer who has big feelings.”
Alanna Wilkinson released her song Dream boldly in honor of Rafferty.
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